May

it's been a long time since i update my blog. there is so many things happen.. ^^
first is my birthday, this year's birthday is really simple.. ^^
on the 1st may, vic n eve help me celebrate my birthday.. really thankz to them o... ^^ arigato..
thn on the 2nd, i went to beach.. with family n Bahai friend. well, it was not for my birthday, it was for twelve day of ridvan... well, really have fun there, haha... but i bring wrong cloth, so lastly ended up wearing my mom's cloth... ^^

thn later at night, i call fanny , cts, lemon, louise to go yam cha.. so just chat there... it's been a long time since i go out.. well, i seldom go out.. haha...

well, one more thing, louise n me got the same interview couses... hope we both can go in to the couses we want.. ^^

thn, yesterday, was a busy day, when we rest at night time, my big sis suddenly start to "decorate" me.. well, she some how come out with a kimono, and start dressing me up.. well, it do look like kimono.. but, kinda funny also...la.... ^^

mayb it was just me

since young, i dun really like ppl breaking promise,
like they say wan bring me to somewhere,
i will put much hope on it.
but,
once they break the promise,
the only answer i got is that we need to be flexsible,
need to c the time,
need to accept ppl breaking promise.

but, sometimes,
i really hope, that ppl can fulfill at least one promise they made to me
exspeacially some one that is important to me.
i dun like ppl making promises.

but i do make promises, ant will no mater how, fulfill it.
even thn i get scolding later.
but i always kept them.

but i really hope ppl will keep their promises.
really i hope.

today, some one said coming to c me, i did prepare, but i din even get an answer,
nor did tat person came.
this made me think of the sandakan trip.
if tat really u can't go, plz, dun promise me.

i am really scare i become someone who doesn't believe in promises people made..

a door to be open

infron me is two door, a door that looks small and timid
and the other, big and mighty

i turn to the mighty door,
thinking how to open it,
it must take all my might to open it.
But to my surprise,
when i tried to open that mighty door,
just a push,
the door came trembling down

then, i turn to the small and timid door
thinking, this door must be as heavy as stone
as hard as diamond
i gather all my might,
and give the door a push.
but, to my surprise
the door open so easily,
as if it was never been close.

the mighty door tell me,
don't judge a book by it's cover
the timid door tell me,
don't let your past be an obstacle

we always doubt how to open each door
but,
now i know how
another question comes out,
which one do i go in?

30 march 2007.....

well, i woke up today and found out that half of my family members are sick.
this means that i need to do all the work..
will, i mean ALL.... n u noe how tired tat is...
haha.... luckly my mom din really ask me to do al..
luckly for me.

the day b4 yesterday i got a sms saying that he will go to ns on sat...
which is tomolo....

one part of me felt gad that at last he is able to go, and won need to bother it anymore..
but one part of me felt sad.... T.T

haha.. i think i do need some time to overcome it de...

but you never noe....

3 month is not tat long... but when u start to count the days, it make it longer.. and longer...
haha.... stupid me

well, i'm still thinking will i go to the trip, since that its been a long time we din gether together.
but, karabunei is really a place i always go de...

haha...

but mayb70% of me will go... but a nother problem arise...
i have NO CAR>>> NO TRANSPORT....

haiz... i think i contact steph n c how la... ^^

got my result today...
it was bad...
haiz...

another day..... another day

fasting month.....
means need to wake up early... ^^
so i have been waking up early n also been sleeping late....
so wake up early + sleep late = not enuf sleep..

haha........

well, during fasting month, i usually gain weight. but this year, i loose weight T.T
tat is a terrible news for me.....
so sad..
most of my cloth already vry loose...
haiz.......
but nvm.... it is fun to fast.... but it is quite tired also..

haha..... so hope i can manage it o....

wat?

new year, a season where ppl will feel happy, will wish one another.
tat season is when all the love n blessing will go flyin around...
but, i duno why, i dont really can blen in to this season.....
i tried to blen in, but the more i try, the more i felt drop out..
haha...... so i just keep quite..... until i dun really talk much.....
and act as wat ppl wan... n not wat i am.....
it is hard, but i duno wat more can i do....
even at home, a mask was always with me...
when can i be me again? y cant anyone accept me as me...
n not as wat they hope to be...
why?

this new year, i duno wat meaning to me..
now, i also worried with my future..
wat can i do?
i really scare i did not do well, due to my health n hospital visit..
i noe i cannot blam anyone..
but i noe i tried..
so wat i get is mine...
n there is nothing i can do noe...

sometime i cannot sleep, thinking many things...
but i really duno who can i tell..
i duno who to tell..
ppl use to say tell ur friend... but the ones who i tried as friend,
didnt respond to this call..
some time i wonder, them , will they tread me as wat i tried them?
so, slowly, i start to feel lost...

now, i am wondering in a path i duno where it will leads....

new year?

first of all... Happy New Year o...
well, today is the third day of new year, which usually, ppl will go visit most of ppl de house... but i din go anywhere
hahaha....
actually i wanted to go somewhere de.. but i duno who to call to go tat place..
anyways,,, wat to do......
i can only be at home today...
n no ppl came visit as well..
haha.. this is the first time i dun really have the mood of chinese new year..
i mean, this begining of the year, i basicly din have any mood for any celebration..
haiz...
valentine, birthday, new year,.... i really duno now...
haiz,,,,....

but lastly, still need to wish everyone, happy new year.. i mean... happpy chinese new year. to every one...

hope every one have a wonderfull new year, may your wish come true.. ~!~!~!

have u every been to a misarable day??
haha..
plenty of things happen to me...
but, sometime, i dun really wan this things to happen... but i just cannot help not to let tat things happen.

haiz..... how?

sometime, i feel like will i be remember?
i mean, i always feel that can i find some one to talk to?
i mean a friend...
mayb i'm not someone ppl will remember....
but...
haiz..
mayb i'm not someone who noe how to make friend..
haiz....

i just heard the news.. although it has pass many days, but wat i can get is, when ppl have problem, but, there will always be ppl to help u

sometime, we cannot say this world is cruel.. coz, when we look around, even small little good deeds, sometime make us feel good.

at least, in this time, there is still ppl that is kind hearted enuf to help people...

but, i am no way getting health... haiz.//// but i really hope can leave a normal life..

but now, i can't even eat cold, hot, heady food..... all i can eat is normal plain food..
at least i still can eat pizza... haiz.....

well, every ones live will change, but towards wat path? a better one o towards the worse? i have a feelings that my life will change from now, but to where?
i don't really noe it my self.....

hmm.. as time passes by, i am walking towards 20 years old... but i dun really like it...
i look down, n c so many ppl younger thn me... ... haiz.............
nothing to say...

anywhere.... wish all happy new year.....

everyday seems the same...
but i really hope something different.,...
now, one year has come to an end...
some times i wonder, have i done wat i wan to do?
o have i not?

ppl has reach thier goals, but have i?
oh, another more year,
i have grown... but am i really learn that much wat i should learn?

another new year, another brand new wishes,
but have i fulfill all my wishes now?
i look at the young ones,
oh my, how big i have grown...

another new year, means another wish
can i fulfill them? i dun't noe.

have i walk the path i wanted?
but i don't have the answer.
all i can do, is continue walking, until i reach my goal...

happy new year

my day

today, i was so tired. i been teaching the whole day, plus my leg has blister..
T.T
tomolo duno how to go work
whole my leg pain, coz yesterday de high heels.
haiz.
tomolo is winter day.
how a?
duno how
hope can go home early.
one more thing, i haven buy my cloth for working..
die lo
duno wat to wear...
haiz......................

start work

i started work last week..
it is been i think two weeks from now.
feeling tired...
i mean vry tired
hais./.....
^^
but still ok la i think..
christmas, hope got holiday
but i scare dun have o
haiz

my house in a mess now, my mom making pinata.
hope can help her, but cannot
well, nvm la... ^^
hahaha

hope i can stand walking to work

ya, tty is going to ns, hope he will be ok lo.. ^^
jia you

so tired~!~!~!~!

so tired from exam....
haiz
but stil.. jia you o.... ^^
few more days to go~!~!~1

wat to do?

sometime, i dun think i can stand the house...
wat am i talking about?
i also not sure...
but i dun think i like the house anymore..
everyday, only they talk that wat we need to do..
when they ask us wat we wan, but, when we say what we one,
our voice is being cover up with all their words
wat could i say, sometime, i see things much more then them
coz tat is wat i am good of, but they only listen to what other ppl say
n dun believe their own daughter...

sometime, i mean all the time, i feel lonely,
but wat can i do? nothing
y\? what can i do?
i am sad, yes, vry sad,
i duno how can i be happy.
i am depresse...... i duno what should i do
when can i got the believe of my family?

how? how?
life without a listener, life without a ppl to listen
lonely... dark
cry in the dark
but what could i do?
can anyone tell me?
i duno....

a life with family, but i dun feel them
life with friends, but i feel lonely
wat can i do?
i don't know...
just feel to voice my voice now....
but i noe i cannot.

thinking deeply

i just finish my convocation yesterday, but i dun feel a thing now.
i duno wat is happening to me now..
i really duno...

bad luck?

sometimes, i been thinking, do u believe in bad luck?
well, yesterday me day is bad luck
guess wat?

well, i woke up at 8.. not that i wanted to... but i was wake up by the voice of my grandma.. not forgetting that i always wakes when there is voice..
haha, well, i when to sleep at 2.30 n wake up at 8, so guess wat, i ran out from room n sleep at sofa.. (bad idea)
coz not til 10 minit, my grandma come asking me y slep at the sofa...
well.. my answer was so stupid... coz the room was hot.... hahaha

thn my mom say that we need to go out to go for raya..
wat~!~! raya, when i'm having sore through???
har? wat to do... just eat la./...
thn it started to rain
n my pa bring us to go servey, coz my mom wans to buy some paper..
when i reach home.. it is 4.. children class..
i thought i don't need to go.. mana tahu, my sister wans to bring the children to park.. which means i need to drive,... duno y my sister dun't wan to drive.....
thn hor, the car cannot start...
stupidcar.
thn play at there la...
thn come back time the car also cannot start.
again.
thn the arlam when off..... wah.,.. everyone was looking at us.... ..
wah... i so hope i was not there
thn my dad came...
so happy..
but i need to send the children back home... the worst part is that my big sister no need to follow, coz she dun noe the place... wat the....
i reach home at 7.30. guess wat, my tuition starts at 7.30
meaning to say i am late..
i reach tuition at 8.20
wah.. not yet eat my dinner..
T.T
study till 9.30 reach home
eat things thn i doze off at sofa .. coz too tired. my big sister calls me to sleep at my room
but guess wat, i was dreaming n i was scolding her..
wah... my family laught at me...
so cham o...
T.T

hope this few days will be better for me~!~!~

hope? light?

i'm lost now...
duno where to go
walking alone..
yes, i dun't reallt noe how to comunicate with ppl.
i basicly noe nothing.
so?
my life goes trought many things, some terrible things that i dun wish other will walk tat path
there was no helping hand, n i face everyday with doub.
wat can i do?

to talk where no ppl is listening, how can i communicate?
i really don't know.
passing each day is a pain
ya, no feelings of the real me review in my face
how fake is it?
yet, i been say, by almost everyone i noe,
but have anyone really listen b for wat i feel b4 telling me wat i need to do??

i use to think that i will have a sholder for me to lean to...
but i found none.
wat i go across each day, my problems,
i dun think any one noe....
hahaha...... i laught at my self
how useless am i.....

useless

galz?

yesterday when to kk....
haha.. bunch of galz....
so will be vry vry vry funny coz gals do talk
when i was walking with them, i started thinking... sometimes, gals are really important to galz..
haha.... funny huh...
yesterdat, whole kk was pack...
coz hari raya was near, n tat day is depavali.
as i was looking at the streams of car, and look at everyones faces,
i think, wow, this is such a busy place, but once i glance at the blue sea, i felt a different way,
sometimes, life can be vry busy, but in all this busy times, there always be a place where it is co calm, a place where it can bring a new hope for you.

well, i spend most of my time window shopping, and it was a vry long time since i window shop,
i really miss those times, when wat i have is only time....
but now, the only thing i dun have is also time..
haha.....

btw, yesterday as i came back, i saw behind my house, a flower, in the middle of the bushes,
so nice n beautiful, it refreshes my day.... i think , i will refreshes ur day as well.....

a day?

wat a day..
everyday studying..
hope everything will go smothly...
jia you o me..~!~!~!

new look

a brand new look for a bran new me.....
haha... hope so la...
but i been thinking many things this few days..
haiz
i dun noe wat to say... meaning speachless.
but i just will live my like usual...
change my attitude a bit to more better..
hope i can make it
n be happy,
really happy....

my wish for my self, pass my exam with flying colours
n be healty.

a day of living.. a day of life

ppl always think wat they can do after they grow up.......
i hope to think so.... but to tell the truth, i'm a afrait to think....
not because i dun wat to think, but i'm scare to think.
i really hope i do not have any problems, but i cannot deny that the fact,
i really have problem.
i dun dare to face the truth, i dun dare to ask.
i fear that wat i fear most come true.
i always think in the middle of the night, wat if wat i fear most come true?
what will i do?
how will my life be?
wat can i do?

living a day, means a life to me.
i really hope everything will be ok with me.

today just have a fight with my family....
haiz.. now, i dun feel like anything.
i really duno who can i trun to now....
use to hide myself in my own coner. now i start to ask my self, when can i go out?
i seldom show my feelings, happy o sad,
a smilling face was on my face,
but wat is whithin? i my self not sure.
but i noe i need to be strong, but i do hope a for break.
i hope for a sholder, i hope for a life

hope i will be ok, hope i will be fine,
hope i will be strong enuf to face everything
i noe, where i have a hope, there will be a life..
well, living.. is life

moon cake festival

today is moon cake festival...
yeah.....
means nice food, nice drink n all......
hihi.... although feel bit not happy today... plus now aa n in major pain, plus today exam is 100% terrible, but i think i will be ok la
just tat i canot go out... T.T
haiz... nvm la....
happy moon cake festival lo..... ^^
to everyone n also most important me~!~!~!~!~!

another day

haiz...... time flys.... n i'm going to sit for my exam next month..
not kidding... NEXT MONTH..
haiz..... die lo me... duno how o... now starting have nightmares.... cannot sleep well... ~!~!
my nightmare is coming near...
am i prepare? am i?
now is my exam time... hmm.. ppl must think wat am i doing here now? shoulden i be studying now?
but the point is i been reading for like whole day liao....
need a bit rest.... so come in fron the com just to update my blog....
n c any news to 8 also... haha
btw, i cannot just sit infron the books rite?
i been sleeping with them... basicly with books 24 hours... (i'm nuts)
so need to get of the books a while....
i'm feeling not well now... a bit scare of my health////... hope nothing bad happen to me... (choi choi)
lastly, wish every one who sitting for exam.. jia you jia you n jia you o....
especially ME,..~!!~~!~!~!~!
jia you o!~!~!~!~!~

btw, i just recover my chat box... feel free so tell me anything there...
press tag.. n u can c the chatter box

at last..

at last fihish my seni project..
haha.. din sleep for 24 hours...
miss those time...
all come together n help each other........
n finishing the art work...
so happy...
hahahahaha...
gong xi gong xi my self coz done my project.. ^^
hahahahhahahahhaah

...

teacher just told me tat i need to pass up my project at next web... die.... lo.......
haiz... jia you o me

today

since a long time that i din write my blog..
hahaha
today not much happen... but now i duno how to finish my art project... omg.......
haiz
i have only one week but i haven finish half...
i duno wat to do... so fan o....
T.T
but anyway... i need to jia you....
jia you jia you o me..~!~!~!

movie

wah...~!~! now only i know that sometimes, cartoons will be also quite scary....
haha.... starting to do my art now... busy busy busy,... T.T
really tiring....
but i sure can do it on time...
tomolo is the choose life thinging...
haiz,,,,.......
start so early..... duno can wake up o not..
thn hor, duno how to go somemore...
i think tomolo wil be ok de la.... ^^
+hope so.......

thinking.....

hmm... i'm keep on thinking... so many things to think... but no conclution....
hahah,....
u noe wat i'm thinking? i duno wat colour to put in to my art work....
haiz........
noe just slimply filling in the space
n the colour looks so stupid... =='
well, life is still the same.. just with the presure of STPM.....
haiz...
starting to get some pimples.... haha.. some konon...
today i came across a funny thing. i when to one of the govement derpartment to get some poster, thn i need to take some books too. so i went for the second time... n guess wat, i got scolding from the pegawai there..
haha.... but lastly he still let me take..... luckly.. if not a, tat reeve must belanja me lo...
well... one good news is that now i dont need to go for monthly check ups after my stay at the hospital... but instate, i only need to go for 1/2 year checkup... so happy....
hope i will get healthier.....
hope everyone i noe gets healthier....
n my family too... ^^

wah~!~!

haha..... since a long time i din come n visit my blog...
haha
every things seems ok la...
but just tat my result is terrible
haiz....
wat to do..... i prefer taking care of my health now
if not a... haiz.... going always to the hospital
not fun at all.....
so which one i wana choose? of cao health la...
but i hope to get good result at my finale exam o....
hahaha
think too much
btw, i'm gona finish my exam tomolo!~!~!~!~!
yeah... goood news for me...
but no holidays..
coz got extra class...WAT THE
n during extra class i need to go to hospital...... haiz~!~!~!

at last

at last i done reformating my com..... haha.. can on9 as usual liao/.... so happy,....
ya, tomolo is my driving test.. so scare... hope can do all the best..
hahaha...... hope i dun stress up.. >< Lol//...
wish me luck lo..... ~~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!

hospital...

i hate going to the hospital.... but i still need to continue going till ogos...
not sure is it till ogos leh.. mayb will be longer
T.T
u noe, i am so sick of going there... it will take me the whole day.
but wat can i do?
i am sick, n yet i am those type which not really now how to take care of my self.
so, sick, still going to school as usual. i think not many ppl noe that i'm sick..
hahaha...
hmm, today i did a type of test where i have so many wires on my head
n then they let me c something like a point(but much more bigger) then the back ground keep on moving
n let me dizzy..
later on the doctor put another two wires behind my ears, n let me listen to some really irritating noise.
so guess, my graph goes up n donw. haha... that doctor say mayb it is ok, coz i was irritated by the sound
i really hope so... few days of break
thn i need to do to mr scan(if i'm not wrong)
haiz... tat will take me the whole dfay.
not fun
byw, i took my ping pong n interact pic. haha, they look funny. but nvm la.... ^^
good news, i got band 5 in my muet.... so happy liao...
hahahahahahah
ok.i need to go momom lo.....
later will more sick.. haha

???????

wat days is this few days... many things happen at school. n i sure know many ppl had read o hear bout it.
haha.... somethings i start thinking, y things like this will happen? aren't we 19 o 20 years old ppl? mayb it is the time for us to c things in a different way. sometime i feel that at school, small things looks big for us, but for those ppl who had gone to work n deal with other ppl at socialty, i think this is just a small problems... ( thats wat my mom say usualy)
well, i admit it that i'm not those type who can forget things easily, o go over one things tat easily. i also has temper, n a bad one....
haiz, need to change tat.
just tat i been thinking many things this few days after so many thing occor,....... i need to stay calm, i think i really need. many things i think, " xi guan jiu hao la"
mayb once u have been use to it, then, it will not hurt tat much, o be a big thing to u...

yes

tomolo start schooll.....
din play much at this holiday, coz was in the hospital..
but i went for movies n also the fun fair..
hihi
so happy.. ^^

i'm here again

there are so many things i wan to say, but i dun noe how to say...
well, this few days is exam... but i'm sure i will not do well in this exam...
haiz... not tat i did not study,
but if u r at my house, n u can study, i really respact u...
every day it is only fighting,
wat kind of house is this??
well, my sickness is getting bad, n i dun noe how bad it will go...
hope that i will get well soon.
i did not when to the doctors, because no ppl bring me there.
haiz, i really dun noe wat kind of life is this
today, i canot c well, my eye has some problem, sometime, i'm really scare that i dun not have time for this world..
i reallt scare....
so i really need to appriciat life...
all that i can life....
although there are not many ppl noe bout this... o really care bout this... there is some one who care bout me, but their hadr work also have its border....
well, the only thing i have for my self now is hope. n hope i will live on.

hinese exam ... so headact.....

today is my chinese exam... so headact o me......
u ne, i actuay fnish red... but i dun remember a thing... ithink now is the time for me to be hard working already... haiz....
so, today's paper is like OMG... u ne at i mean...
i meet cikgu lim, my class teacher... he doesn't look ok... i think because i did bad in his paper... haiz.. irealy wuld not like taht to happen ....
s now feeling hrrible, terrilble...
plus, all the com in the librrary now is been ue by my friend to play games.... so u now how i feel now...
but wat cani do.. forgt t tell u where i am now...
i am sti in schol library,,....
playig the comm...
ot fun at all....
will be going out asap...
hrgh....
i really pe so...
b4 the teacher come scolding me .....
^^
just for now...

p.s my cm was strick by lightning... so this is how i enden up here now~!~!~~!

wat a day

haha, today i start off my day by calling people up from bed... i call him from 8.00 morning until 9.00 am... one hour, i call to his hp... but no answer, thn at last, i call to his house.. this of coz made him wake....
haha, but he is already late to go for tuition...
thn after that, i help abby to find for ho ching.. haha.. tat also took me a long time..
thn i when to tuition. study there till 11.30 n after that, me, abby, ting yao, ho ching, mei choon when to eat pizza.
haha
still ok la.. i n abby belanja ho ching.
later on, i went to find for mothers day present.
ting yao is having a hard time choosing his present..
haha.. we choose till like 4.00. then, we go damai to but stuff for de cake... T.T i cannot bake cake for my mom. so sad.
thn i when to teach children class of coz..
haha, they are still so cute...
thn here am i, on da com.. ^^

hope tomolo's mothers day will be fun ~!~!~!

其实很多男孩都不知道……

其实很多男孩子都不知道，女孩子在冲他们发火后自己却转过身不断啜泣。
其实很多男孩子都不知道，女孩子从来不会真正生他们的气，因为她是真的喜欢他在乎他。
其实很多男孩子都不知道，女孩子只会对她自己喜欢的男生唠唠叨叨，也只会对自己喜欢的人耍性子。

你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，她根本不会来在乎你关心你，她是怕你做错事情。
你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，她根本不会对你发火，不会冲你撒娇，不会让你哄她--因为在别人面前她都是淑女。
你要知道，假若她不喜欢你，你根本就没有本事让她哭泣，即使让她生气也不会超过2天！

而这一切都只是因为她喜欢你，
而这一切都因为你还不够在意她不够懂她……

于是，你们时常争吵，你认为她脾气不好，她认为你不够迁就她……
于是，你们总是冷战，你以为她不喜欢你，她以为你不在乎她……
于是，你们总莫名其妙的彼此错过，也许擦身而过本身就是一种悲伤着的无奈与幸福……
要知道，凄美依然是美的一种，并且美的绚丽悲凉而沧桑，那是更加的美~

因为她喜欢你，所以才偶尔冲你发火，时常对你撒娇。
因为她喜欢你，所以才会生你的气；而又是因为喜欢你，她才不会去生气那么久。

你可知道，每个女孩子的心都是水晶做的，晶莹剔透，很容易就碰伤摔碎。
你可知道，每个女孩子都是不设防的，你那么轻易就闯进她的心，走的时候却只留下伤害！

她从来都不知道，这个世界上根本没有可以让她哭的人，因为真正值得让她哭的那个人根本舍不得让她哭……
她会很矜持，她会很骄傲，她会很冷淡，她总是嘴里说着“你走开”，心里却一直叫你留下。
请竖起你的耳朵，也请打开你的心，去听她内心真正的呼唤吧，而不是她嘴里的口是心非！
她会看着你转身，然后她跟着你转身；当侧身而过的时候，你看不见她的泪，那是滂沱在心里的泪~

如果你喜欢她，请多陪陪她；如果你喜欢她，请多宠宠她；如果你喜欢她，请多让让她……
如果你真的喜欢她，请你去听听她内心的声音，那是一种呐喊！
请你张开臂膀拥抱她！
在爱情世界里，你们总是彼此伤害着，彷佛这样才能证明自己爱得激烈，爱到轰轰烈烈！
可是，爱情没有孰对孰错，更没有你比我多我比你少的概念。
你爱她，她爱你，如此就已经足够，不要试图让彼此受伤，让彼此更加脆弱悲伤。
你们彼此相爱需要的是温暖、是幸福、是甜蜜、是快乐，而不是伤害。

不要用沉默宣战，不要互不相让，更不要什么话都不讲就漠然离去。
要知道，当你离去的时候，你的眼睛起了雾，她的眼角泛着泪光……
越是安静，战火就越传，这是冷战，也是彼此的伤害。
无论以后怎么的复合，那些伤口是曾经存在的，是你怎么也抹不去的……

请给她一个拥抱，用你的拥抱去化解她心里的悲伤与眼角的泪水。
她喜欢你，她绝对不会拒绝你的拥抱，她只会害怕你的冷漠、转身的无声安静。
请记住，相爱的人不要宣战，因为带来的伤害超出你的预计。
也请记住，只要你喜欢她，没什么是你接受不了的，只要你喜欢她，就喜欢她的一切一切。

那么她所有的小性子、所有的坏脾气、所有的臭毛病在你眼里都是撒娇。
也请记住，她喜欢你，需要的不是你真的转身，她嘴里说着的也不是她真心话。
她只是想你宠她，想你抱她……

muet>?

today is my muet speaking.
hmm... terrible o...
haiz.. wat to do....
but , still ok la... ( i hope so)
today i settle my tshirt..... hope it will turn out rite... i really hope.. n the time.. hmm...
haiz.. the library thing some more... headact....
so wat can i do?

mky birthday

yesterday was my birthday. at first, i din hope for anything... coz not much ppl wish me at school...
but when i reach home, chun ping call me to wish me,... thn i got many msg from my old old friend... haha.. they all wish me happy birthday..
afterthat, my family bring me to have dinner outside..... so happy. my pa also give me a tilam... so nice,,,, i can sleep well now.
thn i when out with my friends to easy way at beverly........ haha.... just chat chat n talk talk there. thn cut cake...
afterthat, i when to tanjung aru with ting yao, tet san, n yew. haha... we walk to the beach,..... so nice..... n cute too... ^^]
thn i went home... that is how i celebrate my birthday this year... ^^

hiaz

haiz.... duno wat to think... haiz.
haiz............. so luan now....
haiz

some times...... but really?

sometimes.. i feel that i can share my feelings.. but really, when i think back... can i??
i feel sad sometimes... but, can i feel that way? o it is something wrong?
sometimes, i wana find a person to talk too.. but who can i find?
sometimes, i think that i can go over with a problem, but i know i can't.
sometimes, i wan to share my happyness, but than only i noe that i have no one to share my feelings to.
sometimes, i feel like wan to cry, but at last my tears flow inside to my heart.
sometimes, i feel empty but wat can i fill tit in???

haha... manything i pass just like that.. with no feelings n all.. the only thing that make me going is time... n also my will to continue study.
when i feel bad, i really hope someone would noe.... but is there/?

just like today, when i talk something, i been scold.
n when i wanted something, i also been scold.
i need to listen to everything, without saying no.
i'm afaird to say no. but thn, ppl say i do not have my own point of view. everything is needed to be done readly for me.
when i talk, ppl will not listen, so wat is the use if i talk?
i have learn to no talk. just listen. i think tat at least will not hurt my feelings which is oledi empty.
i do not hope for anything now.... nothing....

today... thursday..`!~!~~!
hihi.... i got a meeting today...
finish around 3.
yes.. ta day at least i got talk with her... ^^
so happy... BERJAYA...~!~!~!~!~
need to study now./. i dun wan to fail..~!!~!

tuesday.. Holiday~!

hihi.. today is holiday..~!~!~
at last i go c movie~!~!
haha... i went to c i'm not stupit......
the movie is so touching.... LOL... cried at cinema.... T.T
haha..... i'm really happy today..
ya, i went for a walk at sutera harbour too.... WAH... so so so so fun o....
the place is so nice.... except it is vry vry hot... ^^
well, i spend my time looking at the fishes...
so cute....
.....
today, i am so happy.. but i also need to finish my work today......
hope i can finish it o
^^
jia you me...~!~!~!

hmm....

haiz.. i fail my chinese again....
feeling not so happy... haiz.. but who will noe.....
hmm.... i just feel down this few days... i need to smile, so that ppl will not noe my feelings,...
so sad..
well, today, i study mat. matermatik most easy chapter.. matric......
i also need to prepare my shirt de design...
haiz
so sleepy.... n tired too.....

hmm....

haiz.... there is so many things in my heart, but i cannot say out.
sometimes, i really wan to find someone to talk too.. but... haha, who i have??
haiz.. so many things i just feel like scream it out... but can i?
sometimes, when i'm sad? i just can cry in to my heart... can anyone noe?
haha... ppl will think that if i dun tell ppl, how tat ppl will noe??
haha.. but wat choice do i have?
i rather choose to be the one to be hurt, rather thn the one who hurts ppl feelings.
somethings, i really feel that i do not have friends at all....
haha
lonely
i don't know how long i can stand... i really don noe..
now, even writing out my feelings is a problem?
how i'm going to stand ?

wah!~!~!~!~!~!~!~

tired~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~
so many work to do... with so little time... T.T
din sleep for 3 days liao doin work.. T.T
now still continue work ... n i have not done my homework......
omg... how o...
haiz... today need to stay up late again....
wat to do.... if wan study thn must work... ^^
GAMBATE to ME~!!~!~!

when out

hmm, today i went out to center point with my friends... i when around 11 morning, to help tty c his things for the fish tank..... thn when to center piont.. continue finding until 12.30.. OMG.. n we haven found the things..
meet louise n steph at watson... not watson actually, i think i should say in forn of the stair...
thn walk together lo.. wait for ppl...
thn i when to take my ring... hmm... fit in nicely... so happy.
we duno where to go.. so guess wat, of coz waist our time walking around.. HAHAH
we took photo together.. haha, long time din take photo... hmm, since when liao a??? haha, forgot
while waiting for the pictures to develope..... we play games... until my hand pain... T.T
thn we when play bowling... wah.. so happy.... ^^
hihi
but thn, after finish playing, when we r walking out, i of coz did the thing i can do best - JATUH... in bowling center... not fun... haha
now having mager pain on my body.. T.T
haiz.. .duno y i always fall down de....
but nvm la....
haiz.. fall till i lay down.. i quickly jump up.. but i noe many ppl saw, coz some one scream...
wah.... duno where to put my face.. haha....... but still ok la... i am use to do that,...
so i think i am vry good in falling down....something wrong with my leg i think./
hmm.... reach home now thn continue my life, work of coz.....
but i need to go take my bath first... ^^

monday

monday......
haha.. a day i use to be blue.. but today, haha, i did my homework... wah.... so li hai eh
i seldom do my homework de.. but duno y this time will do my homework.. haha.. did it for 3 hours...
hmm... i think i'm getting good... `1~!~!!~!
haha.....
today.. fasting of coz.. hmm..... i'm getting thinner o...
can c clearly./..
y does some ppl won get thin when they fast???
haiz.....
hmm... now need to think wat to eat tomolo.....
wat a/..????
haha... need to bake bisckut o.... ^^
hmm... duno how is the tast???
haha i hope will be ok....

YES~!~!~!~!

at last finish my exam.. although i pass up hmm i think 2 blank papers.. ~!~! haha... first time doing that.. y? coz i did not bring my watch... hahaha.. thn hor, got scare thn forgot everything... hahaha
really, sometimes, little things happen in our life can sometime make a big change.... HAIZ.. so meaning to say, i will mostly fail my papers.. not just one, but two of them...T.T
well, holiday is just in the corver. n i duno wat to do...... stay at home? doing nothing? i really need to thing something usefull to do...
well, now i'm having headact on how to pay all the pans???
wat la my sister..... she is the one who ask to get tat all panz.. n ask will finish with the payment.. but thn, wat happen,?? she hutang two ppl.. each person 100 ove,... headact a,,,,,...!~!~! thn all throw to me to think how..... SO So So So So So angry~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
she first say got a way to ask them to buy, but look at now???
wat can i do???
having headact now~!~! how to pay off the depts>?????????
well, one thing i noe is that my sister is not giving me any cooperation at all,.... i really mean it.. HAIZ\1`1`1~!~!~!
wat can i do?
having holiday is not really a good thing for me. i need to stay at home.. n i basicly can't do anything....
so? da point is i hate long term holiday...
nothing to do~!

today

today is the first day of fasting.... din did much things......
hais.... hungry...^^
wish everyong happy fasting..
today i cannot go out swimming with my friends... so sad o.....
but never mind la..

saturday

well, saturdays is the day that i will be so busy, that i don't have time for my own self.. T.T
most of my friends will know that i seldom come out during saterday coz i need to teach at 4.00 and have my tuition on 7.30..
haha, it was somethings different this saturday.
i start off m day at 6.00. wake up of coz.. thn go to putatan, to help uot at a cause for the st. fransis guls. it is thier camp n we when to help uncle kang.
thn when i came back, it was already 1.30.. OMG.. really need a nap.
so of coz i when to sleep. sleep till 3.00.. thn prepare to go bhai ccenter to join thier ayyam i ha children party. so when i reach home again, it was 6.00. take my bath, thn prepare my things, there i was to go to tuition...
haha, that was my whole saturday, boring huh? HAHA....
so how was ur saturday?
mine was vry tiring, plus that i did not sleep on friday.. how could i sleep when i was sad?? haha,
so meaning it was like.... DAMn tired
haha, luckly my eye din swallen up.
ok.. ^^ need to continue my sunday life o

busy busy busy

such a busy day.. every day study stady n stady.. haiz..
pening liao...
today is assembly.. thn was librarian's meeting.. so fan o... hai.z... i so wish that i do not need to take care of the library.... T.T
but wat can i do.. not that the teacher will listen....
so today was extra busy with all the classes that need to be attain.. T.T
SO tired.~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!
but i need to finish my chinese.. wah.. not happy.....
wat to do ........
gam ba tee o me~!~!

when a gal cries

A girl wont cry easily,
Except in front of the person who she love the most, she becomes weak.
A girl wont cry easily, only when she love you the most, she put down her ego.
Guys, if a girl cries bcoz of you, please hold her hands firmly, she's the one who would stay with you for the rest of your life.
Guys, if a girl cries bcoz of you, please don`t give her up, maybe bcoz of your decision, you ruin her life.
When she cries right infront of you,When she cries bcoz of you,Look into her eyes,Can u see n feel the pain n hurt she's feeling?
Think.Which other girl have cried with pure sincerity,In front of you,And bcoz of you?
------------------------------------------------------------------------
She cries not because she is weak,She cries not bcoz she wants sympathy orpity,
She cries,Because crying silently is no longer possible,the pain, hurt, n agony have become too big aburden to be kept inside.
Guys,Think about it,If a girl cries her heart out to you,And all because of you,
Its time to look back on wat u have done,Only you will know the answer to it.
Do consider it,Coz one day,It may be too late for regrets,It may be too late to say "im sorry".
To my friends...Ponder this message seriously.
Don`t do this to a girl,You may regret for the rest of your life.
Maybe in your life,she's the only one that love YOU the most.
Remember this lesson...
Especially to all the guys out there!
Do appreciate the girl you really love no matter how!

today

just come back from ranau....so tired...
was sick the pass 6 days... haiz...
rili sick..... at least now i can start eat already.. if not, my food is just soup with rice.. T.T
well, i wana go bai nian......
this year so nothing to do...
like the chinese new year is so boring..
luckly i still was able to go some place.. hahaha...
need to be happy of that.
well, need to go take bath n eat dinner liao... ^^
wish everyone happy new year o... ^^

today..

so sleepy n tired..
try to think u hv not been sleeping since 3 weeks ago. not meaning u din even sleep at all, but u just slept for like 4 hours a day, wat u feel the next day? sleepy all rite,
that iswat i felt today.
sleepy n need to study, OMG.. tat was so hard... chinese, eco n math, all are hard sublect.. haiz... kesian me...
thn after tat, after school, i need to teach the marching team...
so kesian me o... already sleepy like hell, thn need to teach somemore
HAIZ.~!~!
comeback, at first wana just rest, who noes kena scold... T.T
so sad...
but at least tomolo is sports day.. saringan.. haha
ok, i wana sleep lo.. bb lo..
nite nite

day passes fast

few more days thn it will be the sports day n chinese new year.
well, i'm busying with sport day now, n do not have time for chinese new year.. tat is bas..
haiz, nearly lost my voice everyday.chinese new year is coming near.. but my house is in a mess...
wat i can do?
nothing la..
well, there is been many happy things happening in my group of freinds.. haha,
most of my friend has gal o boy friend liao.. so happy for them... ^^
hope all the best to u all o.. ^^
haiz..... chinese new year go where leh??
hmm, i wana get lots n lots of ang pao... (wah, so tan xin o me)
haha, but tat is the fun part of chinese new year rite,,.. ^^
today need to finish my homework o... &^^

today

i hate it....... i sometimes feel tired too......
haiz... i duno wat happen to me today, i was so in a bad mood...
angry, but i duno how to evpress my feeling. i forgot how to be angry
i really duno how
i'm scare, duno how to sad o cry o angry
although i really mad.. but....
haiz wat to do..
when can i be myself without been say by other people?
when?

wat is the differents between like n love?

In front of the person you like, your heart beats faster
But in front of the person you love, you get happy.
In front of the person you love, winter seems like spring.
But in front of the person you like, winter is just beautiful winter.
If you look into the eyes of the one you like, you blush.
But if you look into the eyes of the one you love, you smile.
In front of the person you like, you can't say everything on your mind.
But in front of the person you love, you can.
In front of the person you like, you tend to get shy.
But in front of the person you love, you can show your own self.
You can't look straight into the eyes of the one you like.
But you can always smile and stare into the eyes of the one you love.
But when the one you like is crying, you end up comforting.
When the one you love is crying, you cry with them.
The feeling of like starts from the ear.
But the feeling of love starts from the eye.
So if you stop liking a person you used to like, all you need to do is cover your ears.
But if you try to close your eyes, love turns into a drop of tear and remains in your heart forever

first day of sports

hmm, today is monday, a b,lue day. but luckly today i can go for sport.............~!~!~!~!~!~!!~!~!
haha, i was change to red... so sad o...
but still ok la... can survive..... ^^ at least last time i use to hang around at red house.
hmm, teach perbarisan.......... still ok...
haha, but need to speak in bm........
hmm,
tomolo holiday, yeah, can sleep late.. so happy..

clean da room

yes.. clean my room.. haha, took all the old books out from my room. now i have extra space to put my cloth. at last i have a space to put my cloth.. ^^
thn i was a lot of cleaning... wipe all my things.. ^^ chinese new year is near.
i come across many of my old things... my letters.. haha, not only tat i noe am actually a write letter lover. my letters is one BOX... OMG>. tat is a lot.
n of coz is my ang pao pack. there are all so nice. been keeping them since young n now i found out that i do not have much space left.
thn i come across a lot of pictures. i was so small last time.. i mean tiny.. ^^
now i have grown alot.. ^^ happy of that. at last... ^^ hahah
all those funny pic taken. haha, miss those old time.. haiz.. old liao now.....
not fun...
but anyways, all those pic a only can keep them as my memory....
well, one good things is i acn wear many cloth liao.. at last... i usually cannot wear all thosecloths, but now i can liao.. need to be happy of tat.
sometimes, i feel scare that i am growing old.. but i cant change the fake that i am growing old...
haiz.. just hope that i can use.. i mean must use my time well.. ^^
wish me luck

7.25pm 星期二

今天，是2006年上课的第一天，踏上害怕的心情去上课了。
这一个星期，心情不好，不知什么地方错了。
可是，被忽烈的感觉却越来越强烈。觉得自己不怎么重要。
到了学校，尽量让那不安的心，稳定起来。
和朋友谈起话来。但，这无法让我的心情平复下来。
不知为何，我好像逃避。不想在讲话。
我怕我自己再也牚不下我的心情了。好像大声地哭出来。 让眼泪把我心里的苦衷都冲出来。
但不知为何，还是哭不出来。
每天晚上，失眠的日子，我不想再拥有了。
好像找一个热，把我心里的话告诉他，和他聊聊。
没有朋友的感觉不好，被忽烈的感觉更不好。
到底有多少个人明白我心里在想什么。
可能，我是一个很难相处的人吧？
觉得自己好失败。哈哈，真可笑。
觉得快要崩溃了。可是不能。我如何是好呢？

new year....

happy new year everyone....
haha, yesterday din spend my new year eve with my class mate... no ppl call thou... T.T
but luckly haha, celebrate with all the bahai friends.. haha...
well, i at 6.30, i when to uncle yon house to eat staem bot.. haha, so nice...
haha, first eat rice, thn eat steam bot. so fun.. it was also wai ho birthday..
haha... when in the middle of eating.. o should i say just finish eat, thn no curen.. haha
tat time, we all take the cake out.. of coz only youth la.. all the adulth at infron eat...haha
thn we sung birthday song, thn cut cake. haha, so fun o...
the cake also so nice.. yum yum...... white chocolate cake... i love it... ^^
haha, thn my sis fren come.. go to peter's house eat bbq.. yeah.. haha, fun o... ^^
there we meet many old friends n also new de.. ^^
haha.. thn play "cho dai di" with them.. loose de need to eat chicken wing.. hahaha...
so funny o.. haiz.. me kena once..
haha but the boys kena more time... hahahaha.. ke lian them
thn when new year.. we all wish each other happy new year.. it was so fun n happy.. haha, all old one year liao.
thn we when to sean sean house.. swimming... hah. swimming at midnight? nuts rite... hah
but new year ma.
haha, swim till 2.30.. thn when to sean house c movie.. but me chat with yen nie..
thn we sleep around 5.00, with the happyness in my heart... ^^ new year, mean a new day, a new hope, a new life.
today, wake up at 8.. haha, rally nuts.. but stay at sean house.. haha, all the uncle n aunty when to sean house, chit chat.. haha
thn around 2.50 afternoon, i go back home.. ^^
uncle chew send me..
but one thing, i can't send sms on new year. so sad o.. T.T was not intime to wish someone happy new year.. sorri o

christmas

yeah... it is christmaz........
but haha.... fall a sick... T.T
so meaning last christmas eve spen my whole day on bed... luckly i'm ok now.. hahahahaahahah
yes..... so bored o this christmas... haha.. at least i got something to do at night..
haha, go sing k at sean's house.. yeah.. but i cannot swim T.T
so so so sad.. since long time i hadt gone swimming.....but when i have the chance, i cannot go swiming.. wawawawa ='O *sob
haha... so today need to show off my teruk de voice.. singing.. haha.. but usually i duno how to sing thier songs de.. coz all english song.. cannot have chinese song de......
haha........
well, if i have my luck today, i can go c movie... but if not.. thn cannot.. haha... have not ask my mom yet... but told my pa.... haiz... how a??
think.. wish me luck thn....
haiz..~!~!~!~!~!~!~!

Dong Zhi Kuai Le

haha.. today is dong zhi... so happy...
haha, early morning can eat tang yuan.. ^^
hihi, but thn need to go out to work.... T.T
tat is not really fun... hihi,
yesterday night when out yam cha after youth gathering... meet many
of my friend there.. ^^ well we yam cha till quite late yesterday ......
hshahaha.. luckly din get scholding from my mom... haha...
but we all sit at the coffee shop there, really just yam chA,,,,.. we just order drinks.. haha..
so funny o.. ppl stil got order food.. but we this bunch of youth just sit there n drink water...
haha...
yeah... now got tang yuan eat.. haha.. tonight's dinner must b vry nice de.. ~!~!~ HAHAHAHAHHAHHAHA
so happy.... but from today, haiz.. need to prepare the things for chinese new year liao.... ai,,,,,.....
haha... jia you o... i need to finish my home work thn only i have time to prepare for chinese new year lo... ^^
wana go eat tang yuan lo... hahahaha...
write my blog other time ^^

some pic

yeah.~!~!
pozing for picture~!

mua sis

my pic..

yeah... just camo back..

yeah.... just come back from TENOM... haha... a family camp...
it was fun, but i was sick.. haha... tat is not fun....
well, conduct the zipopo.. haha... so happy.... ^^ it was ok i think....
my cousin like the hippo... haha... n meet my niece... she is so cute.. just tat at this age need to be an aunty, haha,, tak biasa la...
well, only 41 ppl when to this camp this year.. the funny thing is tat u noe wat? all the aunty n uncle haha... vry vry vry vry playful.. sing karaok for the whole nite till 12.30.. hhahahahaha
SO LI HAi..
n they bring us go eat xiao ye.. haha.... nice o...
haha.... have tast many kinds of weidddd fruit.. haha....
thn wen jln jln at the park... DAMN tired...
haha.....
well, i think this came is way too cold.. all the time is not really fix dead.. haha... like this camp..
haha, we had dinner together with my uncle also.. haha... so fun
^^

wen to kk

haha... today when to kk to get glasses n do all the work...
but thn, u noe wat happen? mom n pa came back n ask me to do the air ticket.....
aiz... ke lian ting yao need to wait outside around 2 to 3...
haiz... luckly he go do his things first,...
thn u noe wat, i ask my sis to help, but thn, she dun wan....
so i rush all the things.. n thn when reach kk, i forgot to do all my things.. cannot thing liao..... HAIZ....
but luckly i sempat buy the spec....haha... so hard to find those spec.... thn buy cd.. for com de....
thn ting yao go buy his slipper... haha....
thn go pick his sister.. thn go home lo... ^^
haha... so happy... my ko ko come back for holiday liao.... ^^
haha.. can go yam cha with him~!!~!!~!~!~!
but now need to work...~!
HAIZ.....

yesterday

haha... yap.. yesterday when to bahaicenter..... ^^ got one uncle came from england to give us a talk... ^^ hihi.. tat uncle is so good.. n kept on smiling all the way...
haha... when he first came to sabah, it was around 1960... n my mom wast born yet.. waw......
well, meet a new friend there.. haha.. came from west m'sia... i think i meet her o her sis b4.. but just cant remember.. HAIZ.....
haha.... chit chat for a while.......
thn wen home of coz...... haha... on9 lar... ^^

well.... afternoon, i spend my time working,.... haiz... a lot things tat need to be done.. T.T
haha....... need to finish my scrip to,........ duno wat will turn out thn ...
just can wish mua self good luck o... ^^ n one more thing.. (I lOVE FRIDAYS>>>)

my sisters b'day....

haha... today is my sisters birthday.....
went out with ty today.... ^^ bring my sis to cp thn go work....
thn when finish work thn go eat dinner thn go home,.,..... ^^
today got my first gaji... haha.. so happy o.... ^^
haha.. although not alot.. but i'm still happy of it.. haha..... ^^
not much things happen today... ^^

today....

i always put my title as today.. some times i really duno how to discripe my day.. today, a horibble day.
i can't really says it is horrible, but something happen that let me feel vry sad. haha..been blam for nothing///......
thn din talk with my family for the whole day.........
sometimes i really dun feel like talk to them.. y? u can fell more that they would not like to care bout u.....
haha.. mayb ppl will say that i am sensitive.. nvm.. i noe wat am i thinking..
haiz..... some times i raelly feel tat it wil be vry good if i'm not here.... meaning i'm not at this earth... crazy thinking rite????
i also duno wat will happen next.... i'm getting more n more not feeling well.. but wat can i say???

wat a day...

today woke up late.. coz yesterday was vry tired....
yesterday woke up at 7.30 in the morning to prepare to go to duno wat wanita thing...
haha, thn came back to home around 2.30.. well, of coz i have free lunch at hyatt. ^^ so happy.
after reach home, i stay at home rest.. haha, coz din really slept well. after that at night, got meeting on the zipopo show. haiz... 16 more days.. n i have not prepare anything... ai......
but the happy thing is yes, at last there will be a camp that i can go... ^^ haha....
well, i have not prepare anyting... wat to do?? cannot thing of anything.. n also duno how.. the song n all i also not yet finish.. hai... how o???
well, today mom n sis n pa went out n i need to cook lunch.. haiz... duno wat to cook also....T.T
not feeling really happy this few dayz. been scold all the way long... really sad...
well, not much things i been doin recenly.. but i need to do my homework lo... ^^
plenty of homework to do T.T
yeah, jia you to me o..~!~!

yes~!~!

yeah... at last finish work liao.... ^^ so happy...
haha... stant for the whole 3days.... now can sit down.. SO 幸福o.... haha...
so now just sit here on9.. n yaya, pc fair, i buy webcam liao lo.. so happy o...
hihi... now can use my webcam.. although it is not so good.. but it is already enuf liao...
haha/////..
i vry fast happy de.....
well tomolo need to work again.. haiz.. need to sleep de lo......

working.. haha...

well.. this is the second day working.. one more day to go.. haiz.... a bit tired now... been standing for the pass 12 hours.. yap.. haha "din noe i can stand for so long... ^^
well.... really have fun doin streamyx promotion.. haiz... but takling n asking ppl to sign up to streamyx... haha.. not easy... ^^
but at least i got some sign ups this two days......
need to be happy for it... ^^
well, tomolo.. sunday.. won be tat easy to finish 12 requirement... today i only have 6.. haiz.....
jia you lo me.... lolz... mom not back yet.. hai.. all need to be done ourself.....
need some sleep now.... so nite nite lo..^^

ai...

today mom n family wen kl luu.... T.T
home a lone... need to do more work.. aizz
need to go do work lo... if not cannot finish by two people o.....
jia you o...... ^^

wah... whole day...

yesterday, when out shopping with my mom... but din buy anything.. haha.. just got myself a cloth.....yap.... ^^
thn at night, help my sister check her thises until 3.xx in the morning.... ai... not fun at all.......
haha.. so woke up vry late today... haha..... seldom woke this late... woke up around 11.00.. ai...
thn have breakfastat home.. thn is working again... haha....
had a late lunch.... just finished my lunch thou.... haha....
so need to go bahai center tonite... need to prepare... n als some of the things that is needed.. ^^
ai.. going to be a lone tomolo n until one week... ai... only two monkeys will be at home... T.T
not fun la.... ai.. but wt to do?

wedding~!

haha... my fren got marrid.. yeah... haha.. really happy for her... ^^ hihi..... woke up so so so early yesterday.. around 4.30 am.. early rite? duno y this few days cannot sleep well.... ai....
thn my uncle from terengganu bring us go eat breakfast.... haha... so nice.. but i cannot eat much oo........ T.T not feeling well thou..... aiz...
thn start going to kote marudu.... for the wedding.. ^^ hihi.... fun o.....
we reach there around 2.00.. ^^ n my friend is getting married... haha.... so happy for them..... ^^...
after tat, when back home around 5.00.. haha... reach kk already around 9.xx....
here is some pictures o...^^

orang utan?

haha, today staied at home n din go to schooll..... too tired.........^^
well, mom ask me to help her find orang utan... haha... the pictures r so so so so cute.. ^^ like it... well cannot write more thn need to finish my orang utan... ^^

today....

today i when to do all the payment with my pa... haha...
well, morning i went to school as usual... thn after library, i went to kong's house.. did not know he actually stay vry near to dorothy's house haha.. there got so many kittens... so cute~!~! n two big cats.. preety..... haha
after reach home, straight away help my mom to prepare her things....
after my mom went off, my followed my pa to pay the bills... went to TM point.. so cute, the workers there all wearing tie tat is printed with the word TM point.... haha... saw stella n thien there.....
after tat, when to center point.. haha... pay the astro bill.... well, there was a fight there.. i mean gal fight... haha...... in side the astro shop... got ppl chao jia....... wa, tat gal really is angry......
thn i when to karamunsing.. haha.. yeah pa speng me eat poridge....hihi... but i ate vry slow, coz i' having hou long tong.... haha
when buy something n then i ended up here.......... in fron of the com after i come back home..^^ haha... to night need to go Baha'i center.haha.... so today need to prepare early... ^^

biithday of Baha 'u' llah

haha.. yesterday was Birthday of Baha 'u' llah... yeah, i got to wear nice nice to Bahai centar....
haha.. i wore all blue, n u noe wat, most of my friends wore blue too... so it was like.. YEAH.. all in blue.. hihi...
got many people went yesterday.. haha... meet many friends.. ^^ so happy..... wai ho told me bout the stpm exam... n it was so scary.. i think i need to work hard lo.... jia you o...~!~!
yaya.... one more thing is tat the refreshment was so nice.... but the not nice thing is tat i'm having "hou long tong" ai.... i can't even eat all those tasty food....... T.T
yesterday slept so vry late.. around 3.. huh.. n i woke up 9.30 this morning.... uhuh... i straight away clean the house.... yap... hihi.. the house is too messy.. i u noe how much i hate to c the house in a mess.
after tat, my pa ask us to push the car.. u noe y? coz the cat cannot start.... push the car is not a big problem... but pushing the can in the rain.. wah.. tat is a big problem.....
haha.. was all wet though.... haha.....
well, duno wat to do today.. hmm.. really need to find something to do de. lo.......^^

some pic at ranau

cousins

ic~!

today....

it been one week of holiday... i think la, but one thing i dun like is tat i stil need to go back to school every day...~!~! OMG

so tired~!~! n not fun at all....... every day need to c those books~! ai.... plus, i getting sick again~!~! arg!

well...... been sleeping more today, hmm a sign that i'm getting sick~!haha...

ya o... tat nigth when to watch movie with yen nie.. lolz, we watch zorro, a nice movie~! yeah like it.... n got a bear again... cool huh~! the bear was SO CUTE~! try think where would i put the bear..... haha..... it was also a mirical that my mom would let me watch movie until 11.xx... haha... nice~!

pass few days, my cousin was at my house too... so happy to meet them again... there are from singapore, so u noe how long only i can meet them once. =) hihi, there r so tall.. n preety of coz.><

well, need to get ready to go bahai center liao.......^^ today is a big day, need to wear nice nice..... ^^

huh?

today is the first day of holiday... yeah... ppl should be happy of it.. but not me.. today early morning... i need to go back to school to check the books in the library... oh well.. wat to do bout it......
haha.. when to school around 7.50 am.... means i need to wake up around 7 in the morning... ai.... but at least i got little rest yesterday.... (except waiting for someone to reach home....) but at last i cannot stand... n of coz..... fall a sleep... got a terrible dream.... argh....... n the thing is... i got back their msg only around 12.xx..... i really do not have enuf sleep.... ai..... .... ><
yeah.. tat was morning... thn din have any breakfast till around 12.00... ai.... here goes again....
well wat to do... need to check all the books... at least i hv reach 800 book... (some thing that i can be happy of today) so tired........ but the bad news is tat i stil need to go back to school... coz y.. coz i'm the ketua ting 6?? wat is this.... u noe, three week is like... damn long ok..... ai......
ok .ok... back to today.... yeah... after having lunch (at last..) when back home in louise's car... hihi.. so happy..... can reach home safely..... ^^
reach home... but my parents was no in.. meaning need to take care of my sisters n brother. ai...
thn wash the colth , clean the room, take the cloth, dry the cloth, clean the fan.... zap.. in is already 5 pm/..... ai,... thn where was i after tat? =) of coz in fron com la... XD
haha.... but now need to cook lo... no idea wat to cook.......... ai,......
holiday so not fun... where also cannot go.. cannot go out, cannot go camp..... ai............... SAD~!!~
but there is more things tat let me feel sad.... now i seldom chat with him.. i start to duno who is him..... n i dun like this feelings... ai....
well today i wil go c movie with yennie... mayb she can help me...... haha... at least some entertaiment for now~!

fun~!

just came back from Ranau...... yeaz.. my home town.. it seems a long time since i when back to ranau...
well.. many things have change there..... haha... but yet every thing still seems the same.... haha... miss the roti canai over there. haha
well... meet my cousin there.... there r so tall~!~! wah.......... i really getting shoter now..
haha..... i when to sabah tea..... nice place...........
if go ranau... i cannot miss to play chess with my cousin..... there r so good.... hai... long time din play.........
well... on the way going back to kk... the mist was so thick until i cannot c anything... wah.. so scary...... lucky my pa was a good driver..... haha.......
well... need to do work lo...........

wat am i?

i use to think.. who am i n wat am i?
i'm someone ppl trow rubbish at?
i am someone ppl dun care at all?
i'm someone tat ppl make puppet at?
i'm someone who wokr hard but at last gets scolding only?
i'm someone trying to chage all my wrong doings but at last stil been scold by ppl?
i'm someone with no friends?
i'm some one which cannot talk my feelings out?
i am some one that cannot say NO.. n when i say that means i'm wrong?

i not sure what am i .. but i noe all above is me...
so meaning i am as a rubbish... yeah... a rubbish.....
funny heh..... ppl can hate me so much,..... n i also hate my self......
i hv tried hard... but it is all useless.... what can i do?nothing.
i'm not friendly at all... no use.....
all my felings i need to keep deep in my heart.... keep it as deep as posible...
i am asking.. wat am i in ur heart? tell me truly... if i'm someone bad.. just tell me... i'm not someone who can hate one ppl easyly..... tat i noe..... coz i my self is hate by ppl.

? vs ??

hahaha.. i alwayss don't know wat to put in my title... it seems vry hard to put...
well... many things has passed... first is prom nite, thn is a day working in the new hotel.. LE MERIDIAN.. fun o... so nice the hotel... i love goin new hotel... tats y i love my mom's job... haha... lucky me o
well, today is bb ball match.... haha... form 6 won. but i noe tat actually the form 4 can play more better if they were not under perasure..... poor them o....... well , tomolo there is another match... haha.... i think they mayb will win gua....
today i spend my time in the library as usual... well, i type the chinese books in to the com... hmm, only manage to finish 10 books.,.. so slow o..... rite? but u noe how long i finish only 10 books? well almost 1 and a half hours... haha..... need to improve in my typing o.... lolz.....
well... another day have pass n i still not yet think wat to buy.. hmm wat to buy a? i'm thinking to make my self.. but i noe many dun like de... wat to do.. wat to buy? y so many ppl birthday at the same time de?
haha... u noe, yesterday something funny happen.. i was involve in one of the party chats... but the point is, i din noe anyone in da party chat... so the only thing i can do was to noe new ppl... it was ok ok for me to noe new ppl o to makes friend.. u all noe that i'm not good at tat.....
well ,... need to finish my home work fast... cannot write more lo.. ^^
good luck to al those is de friends o.. good luck in ur exam...~!

hihi... exam.. two more dayys

yeah... two more days to go...... but this exam... not easy...... is chinese...... wah.. not fun o...
need to study the two books... but the main thing is not tat.... is the book all need to hafal....
ai.....
well.... i think i can finish de.....
jia you o.... yes....... ~!~!

a girl thinkz

When a GIRL is quiet, millions of things are running through her mind.
When a GIRL is not arguing, she is thinking deeply.
When a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions, she is wondering how long you will be around.
When a GIRL answers "i'm fine" after a few seconds, she is not at all fine.
When a GIRL stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying.
When a GIRL lays on your chest, she is wishing for you to be hers forever.
When a GIRL wants to see you everyday, she wants to be pampered.
When a GIRL says I love you, she means it.
When a GIRL says "i miss you," no one in this world can miss you more than that.

hmm..... thinking n thinking n thinking

many days i did not write my blog... kind of busy lately....
haha.... sometimes things does not go the way we wanted.. but wat can we do thn?
today i when to school. actually we go to school to study, but lastly the teacher did not come. so i ended up playing b.ball... funny, i keep long hair, but someone told me i look like a guy, n they actually thought i am a guy? omg? with long hair???
but sometime, we cannot control wat people think we are, but sometime it is really hard listening to them. but the only way to bcome better, to improve , is to listen to them.
well, mayb i am bad n no quallity, o many, but wat can i do? is it my wrong n i need to change it?
ever we felt something we dun wan to feel, but the feel keep on coming?
ever u try dun to be sad but u cant?
ever u try hard to change ur personality but u become worse?
ever u try to make frends but u ended up alone?
had anytime you feel that no people can accept wat you are?
well, wat do u feel when u are no good in anything? n nothing at all?
always people say that there are things that you are vry good in, o if practise, thn you can be good in it. but until now, i never believe it. haha.... when u do not have the talent, meaning u really don't have it. no matter how much you practise or change. haha....

dun ignore ur gf sms.

Jane is a typical college girl who enjoyslife to the fullest.She loves her boyfriend so much and texts him every now and then.
Mark is Jane's boyfriend who works in a call center in Los Angeles.He's always busy doing so many things.He only manage to reply to Jane's texts when he got off from work.
One time, Mark receive a message from Jane : "Hi baby ! How are you ? I miss you ! Call my house when u get home..take care ! I loveyou !"
Mark ignored the message because he always receive the same message when ever it is time for him to go home from work.
"Baby, I miss you...did u eat yet ?! Take care when you get home ! I'll be waiting for yourcall...I love you !"
"Baby, where are you ?! It's unfair that you dont reply to my texts...well, I'm just gonna wait for your call...I love you !"
Mark reaches home and lay on his bed.The last time he knew is that he's reading Jane's text.
He was so tired he fall asleep and wasn't able to return Jane's call.
He can still hear his phone beeps but he's too tired to take a glimpse on the message.
When he woke up the next day, he remembers that he needs to call Jane.He ignored the messages and dialed to Jane.
No one answering in her house.He called up her cellphone and he was surprised that her father answered the call.
In his voice you can feel his tears and hear his heart tearing apart.
"Mark, why havent you called ? Jane was waiting for your call all night !"
"Dad, I'm sorry. I fell asleep being so tired from work...I was calling ur house but no one was answering. Where are you ? So I can come over."
"Just meet me at Jane's house."
Mark went to Jane's house and much to his surprised he saw a lot of people inside.The house were so lighted but you can see the gloom on every person you'll meet there.
He was greeted by Jane's mom on tears.She hug him tight and cried on his shoulders.
"Jane was waiting for you. She didnt come with us because she was waiting for your call.She was killed by robbers that broke in our house. She's gone, Mark. She's gone."
"Thats impossible...she texted me...how could this happen ?!"
Mark can't look who's inside the coffin.He can't move and it feels like his whole body is stuck on the chair he's seating on.
He wanted to cry but it seems that something is blocking his tears to fall down.
He turned to his phone and read the messages of Jane.
"Baby, I'm not coming with my mom and dad..I'm just gonna wait for your call...."
"Baby...I'm so scared...It seems like theres someone downstairs...please call me now !"
"Babe....someones here...they might kill me...please call me now, where are you ?I need you here..!!"
"Baby....I love you !..."
He wanted to shout and cry so loud.It's true that Jane is waiting for his call.Up to her last breath she only thinks about him.
He stared at Jane inside the coffin.Suddenly tears starts flowing down his cheeks.
He can't say anything.The only words he uttered...
"My baby, I'm so sorry ! I could have known,I could have fought for you ! I'm really sorry !I love you so much !"

stop???

this few days working.. ai... at last my eyes can rest.......
well..... yesterday talking with my mom n my big sis about the company....
i was shock when my mom ask me to stop study..... OMG... stop my studies??
the first word come out from my mouth was NOT WAY... NOT on earth that i'm going to stop my studies.....
well, tat means i really need to study hard to ensure i can get a scolarship thn. if not, i duno can i continue my studies to the level i wan o not... ai......
to tell the truth, at first, my mom erally hopes tat i can go to matric.. coz tat can cut down the expenses use by me... but i did not wan to study tat.. i wanted to study chinese.. i noe many ppl think i'm crazy coz i choose to study chinese.. which is not so popular... but.... wat to do... i have choosen this path.. i need to continue my long jouney... n i really need to get result.... ai.... duno how can i do it thn.. i don't wan to loose this appotunity to study...
so JIA YOU O~!!~!!~~!~!!
haha... today i take care of my sisters n brother.. haha.. been beat by my brother for more thn one hour... ai~! but at last he stop n sleep... hmm..... so pain... haha.....
well late lo... need to do homework lo..... ^^
going to study extremely hard~!!~ hihi... jia you o me~!

Its a long time

Well, I seems a long time since I did not write my blog... Many things happen to me within this period of time.
Stil remember tat day my frien got lose in the jungle. lolz. listen bout his story really funny. it was raining and they could not get down from the water fall. but at last they manage to come back safely. really got us a shock.. haha.. a yek call me just to tell me tat his sis also gone missing until 10.xx night.. i mean they left the house at 6.xx morning. he was really scare tat his sis really missing.^^
thn this few days holiday. well, i'm really good in breaking things.. yap, i broke my spec again.. need to tell u clearly.. it is AGAIN. meaning in the whole family, i'm really good in spoiling my spect.. haha.. need to get one new one. well nothing much different coz just change the bingkai of the spec.
well at first the aunty of the shop, (which noe me quite well for breking my spec) took a pink spec for me... PINK?? OMG, i can wear any colour spec except pink. not tat i hate pink, but duno y i just dun like. but at last the old spec cannot fit in to tat, thn only we change to this GREEN one.. lolz.
this few days working over night.. haha.. tired. well i think i really need a GOOD REST.... hihi.. i write until here only o.... time to find my pillow n SLEEP~!~!

sorry

just wana tell many ppl that i felt sorry.
someting i don't mean it, but.......
well, i duno wat to think now accept to study n forget everything that is bodering me.
............................. SORRY............................

out of place??

i really duno wat had happen to me.....
just feel this few month out of place...
mayb i'm thinking a lot, but.....
haha..... wat am i thinking....
today play my most love sport..... basket ball.....
long time din play liao.....
haha..... swet like something.... haha.....
well... need to go....
eat momom lo
bb/

ai~!~!

since a long time din on9......
well... this few days always busy studying......
really not fun studying ekonomi....
but i hope i dun fail it.... if not i need to study bm...
which is not a fun subject.....
ai..........
anywhere, test coming soon...
need to eat book lo..... lol.
meaning read book..... ^^
wish me luck.

meaning

Do you know what is family?
Do you really understand what is behind the word family? It gives me a shock when I know the answer.
So long I never realize I don't know the real Meaning of family.......... Here Is The Answer ...........
FAMILY =
(F)ather
(A)nd
(M)other
(I)
(L)ove
(Y)ou
WHY does a man want to have a WIFE?
Because:
(W)ashing
(I)roning
(F)ood
(E)ntertainment
WHY does a woman want to have a HUSBAND?
because:
(H)ousing
(U)nderstanding
(S)haring
(B)uying
(A)nd
(N)ever
(D)emanding
Do you know that a simple "HELLO" can be a sweet one?
Especially from your love one. (I mean not only from the boyfriend/girlfriend).
The word HELLO means :
(H)ow are you?
(E)verything all right?
(L)ike to hear from you
(L)ove to see you soon!
(O)bviously, I miss you ..

ai..............

ever u feel u been left out?
well... tat is wat i feel now... duno y..
just feel being left out,..............
n that is not a good feeling........

well....... i duno why i feel so...
some time ppl long to have a freind.. i mean a close friend, till
u can tell them wat u feel.... really honestly...
n will not li yong u... but... haha... wat am i to have such a
appotunity?

well... i really sometime wan a friend. but, need a freind that
can noe me, n if i do wrong, can forgive...]
well, mayb i cannot always go out, n i need to do work...
but.... ai....

wat is friend? for me, some one who u can share ur feeling with
and will not get scolding...
someone who will support u, when u need help.
o will not scold u. even u cannot help her o do wat she wan...
i think is hard to be freind..
actually friend is so simple, dun make ur friend sad, o hurt them by saying something hush...
n of coz, make freinds with your heart...
i think that is the purest friendz...
most important is to forgive and to FORGET....

woman

By the time the Lord made woman, he was into his sixth day of working overtime.
An angel appeared and said,
"Why are you spending so much time on this one?"
And the Lord answered,
"Have you seen my spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic,
have over 200 movable parts, all replaceable and able to run on diet coke and leftovers,
have a lap that can hold four children at one time,
have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart
-and she will do everything with only two hands."
The angel was astounded at the requirements.
"Only two hands!? No way! And that's just on the standard model?
That 's too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish.
"But I won't," the Lord protested.
"I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart.
She already heals herself when she is sick
AND can work 18 hour days."
The angel moved closer and touched the woman.
"But you have made her so soft, Lord."
"She is soft," the Lord agreed,
"but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."
"Will she be able to think?", asked the angel.
The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason and negotiate."
The angel then noticed something, and reaching out, touched the woman's cheek.
"Oops, it looks like you have a leak in this model.
I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one."
"That's not a leak," the Lord corrected, " that's a TEAR!"
"What's the tear for?" the angel asked.
The Lord said,
"The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her pain, her disappointment, her love, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride."
The angel was impressed.
"You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything! Woman is truly amazing."
And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
They smile when they want to scream.
They sing when they want to cry.
They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice.
They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
They go without so their family can have.
They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you to show how much they care about you.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning. They bring joy, hope and love.
They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends.Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,
IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

yeah~!

lolz.. yesterday when to get my school uniform o.....
well it looks yellow, tast yellow, feel yellow... yuck..
lolz... for one thing i dun like yellow...
i mean the uniform. lolz... well it is not really yellow
it is more on cream... but i still dun like it...
haha.... well, i when to get my uniform..
so from start school... i will be more on less like a.....
BANANA... lolz... louise will kill me if she c this...
hmm.. wat to do.... need to wear that uniform till next year..
haha....

so , today wat i'm goin to do?
well... feel like to clean my room....
just now finish clean the house.
thn help my mom type her things...
now finish post, go clean my room
ppl will think y i dun wan to clean my room first only post... well
TELL U A SECRET... my sis just wake up...
haha.... so now only can clean
ai..~!~! later need to go out with my grandma...
bring her to clinic.... thn nite need to go bahai center...
well, i hope i can finish my things by then....
lolz.... but i dun think so.....
haha... plenty of things waiting me to finish....

so how is ur day?
yaya... school starting lo....
ai so scare.. cannot sleep late late liao...
cannot play com o c tv liao ... T.T
haha..... but at least i got something to do.......
i mean will not so bored...
haha... so scare to get in the new class.. meet new ppl.....
i really mean NEW~!
bless me n wish me luck thn..... ^^

just come back from camp!~!~!

WELL.... just come back from camp yesterday... lolz... so fun(i think)
haha.. today sleep till vry late
wah.... broke my record.... sleep in the morning till afternoon thn
evening sleep till now... now just wake up.....
haha.... tat camp makes me learn a lot of things o.... hmm.... first time i felt that the time passed so fast~!~!
I REALLY MEAN SO FAST~!~!.

ai..... tonight need to go out again.... to practise step dance.~!
haha... duno where all my tenaga come from
well.... the camp was so fun.... i run around the whole place... haha
cool.. now loose weight pula...
but meet one friend staying at rich view..
elain staying there.... so nice... next time can go her house o...
o call her out... ^^
lolz..... well... need to prepare my self lo....
haha... ^^ need to go take bath.... ^^